getting serious....
.
.
.
.
.
they dont seem to care. they seem to have forgotten.
wait, they DONT care. but have they really forgotten?
but i care! i care i care i care! and can and will never forget.
but they dont seem to care that i care! they dont seem to care that i remember!
do they?
i'm sure they do remember. just that they dont care.
maybe they do care but just dont show it
maybe it seems that i dont care.
maybe i haven't showed it. but i have!
just that they've neglected my invites.
and i've been inviting myself into things.
maybe its because i've changed too much
or maybe its because i haven't changed.
maybe i should just not care too.
maybe i should just seemingly forget too.
but i want to care and i want to remember.
maybe i have to initiate.
maybe its cause i smell.
and they wont even read this.
but do i want them to read this?
maybe i should stop whining and do something abt it.
what maybe. i SHOULD stop whining.
ok stopped

18 November 2005. why the hell did that day have to come and pass.